“What’s wrong?”

“What isn’t?” xe frowns “We’re all going to die.”

“We’re not,” ze rolls zir eyes “Don’t be so fatalistic. So the world outside is full of zombies trying to eat us alive. None of us have been bitten yet.”

“About that,” xe says.

“You’re very sweet.”

“I’m really not.” says the zombie “I taste mostly like decay.”

“You’re letting a pigeon live in your chest and you brought me chocolates. Face it, you’re a marshmallow.”

“I’m a corpse.” The zombie protests, blushing furiously “I’m a corpse with vermin in my chest.”

“Too late, your secret has been discovered.”

“You’re so fucking stupid, you know that right?” xe curses “You didn’t have to take that shot, [X]. I would be fine. I heal better than you do, you fucking human.”

“I’m f- fine,” ze grins shakily “Just a shoulder shot. It would’ve hit you- you in the spine.”