“What I don’t understand,” X said, at approximately 2 am, and was interrupted by a sleepy groan of exasperation. Undeterred, xe continued: “What I don’t understand is how dragonborns even exist. Like, logistically, how do a dragon and a human have a baby?”

“First of all, I hate you. Second, they don’t exist, they were made up by Dungeons and Dragons. Third, that’s not even how dragonborns work, dumbass, go to sleep.”