“Are you ever filled with the urge to like, eat paper, or put makeup sponges in your mouth, or whatever?”

“Intrusive thoughts?”

“Sure. Anyway, there’s- wait no, don’t go in there yet-”

“Why is there a kid in our living room.”

“Listen-”

“You can’t adopt kids on impulse.” 

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“Whatever authority it is you wield, or you think you wield, you have none over me. Let me go.”

“Why would you put glitter on that?”

“No, that’s my blood. Fae, remember?”

“Don’t cry. I’ll protect you. Or, at worst, I’ll kill you quickly.”

“I am, of course, a monster. There’s very little else I could be at this point. And you? What are you?”

“Worse.”

“We need to find xir before xe can make xir next move! Do you want people to die?”

“I mean, we’ve already found xir. That’s what we’re trying t tell you.”

“What?”

“Yeah, [Y] over there like, had xir for dinner. If you know what I mean.”

[Y] shrugged “It ain’t cannibalism if you ain’t the same species.”

“You look like someone murdered your puppy.”

“Uh, [X]. That’s [the person X murdered last night]’s lover.”