“Hello, lovely,” says the star child “How are you today?”

“Tired,” murmurs the being of the void “as always. But i’d prefer not to sleep and waste a single moment with you.”

That’s gay. Star child, did you hear that? That was so soppy. Star child, I’m trying to talk to you. Beings of the void aren’t supposed to be sweet, ew. I think I’m getting cavities.


Hey, star child, are you listening?

“Pretty much never,” responds the star child “What up?”

That- Okay. I guess. As long as you’re listening.

“Who are you talking to?” asks the void being.

“No one important.” says the star child

What. Hey, I am an omnipresent force of knowledge-

“Oh, okay,” says the void being “So… you want to watch a movie?”

Excuse you. I am right here. I have something important to tell you, star child.

“Oooh, we could do an Iron man binge,” says the star child excitedly “I’ll order pizza.”